how fragile are the very strong

Things that you forget and then remember...

1. Laundry etiquette. How long does one wait before putting their neighbor's laundry on top of the dryer so that they can get some wash done?
2. When was the last time you actually had to go into a bank? I forgot my pin number today when I stood at the counter, asking for my three rolls of quarters. I'm hoping I won't have to go back for awhile.
3. How young nineteen year old boys are.
4. In the fall, how everything seems romanticized and nothing seems real.

Things that I wish...
1. I wish I were braver. That I could be that person who steps up and fixes things. That I could say the things that I want to say, that I could look you in the eye.
2. I wish I were stronger. That I could be that person who seems to always have it together and that can hold up other people. That I could be strong enough to be braver.
3. I wish that time would slow down and let things happen.
4. I wish I were able to do the thing you want me to do and that I knew what that was.

But for now, I'll settle for a glass of wine, some music and the sounds of this old house, with secrets to share and with places to tuck new secrets. I'll probably try at least two more times to keep the cat off the cupboard and then I will probably give up and go to bed. Because lately, I am an insomniac and wake in the wee hours of the morning, wondering what time it is, only to discover that it has been only two hours since I crawled into bed. So tonight, I'll probably read a little, falling asleep when I least expect it.

leaves rain down in an unexpected hailstorm outside the window. looking twice, a realization that the leaves are translucent, colored, soft. they are not hard, unyielding or icy. looking again, they are floating, wind-torn and tired.

Quote of the day:

“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” - Raymond Lindquist